I keep saying the thought of growing old scares me. If it was possible to turn back time, I totally would do that and go back in time when I did not have responsibilities and nothing to worry about.
24th March 2017 : 18:01 PM
Am writing this and wondering what to do tomorrow for my birthday. Am currently in Zanzibar, Tanzania (I will do a blog post on my stay here). My friends are chatting me and asking what plans I got for tomorrow. Seriously, I have no plans. I will just come to work and later on see what the day has in-store for me. But wait! I could order a cake and celebrate in the office? Sounds like a great idea but I will need enough time to order the cake. It is already six in the evening. I also started working out and the thought of adding more calories makes me re-think the idea of getting myself a cake.
A colleague sitting next to me asks me how old am turning and I tell him 21 years. He laughs out loud and says am kidding I laugh and tell him am ‘Forever 21’. I seriously need to do a reality check on how old I am. In the beginning of the year, a close friend of mine told me he is freaking out since he is turning twenty five years old. It’s really funny how time flies. This colleague tells me they do not celebrate birthdays here because it simply means you are close to your death bed. Rolling my eyes I tell him it’s also the day that one came to this world and one should thank God for it and it should not be taken for granted.
Ok, I don’t know how tomorrow will turn out but am really waiting for it. I cannot wait to be an year older, an year wiser.
Tomorrow is my birthday….Am turning twenty four!
25th March 2017 – My BirthDay
I wake up to a whole lot of happy birthday messages from my friends and that’s when it really hits me that am one year older. Flashback on how God has been so good to me for the past year. His favors have seen me to where I now am. Am now officially twenty four years..**Playing Katy Perry – Birthday**
I had never thought of myself been a twenty four year old lady and right now as I write this, a tab is open on my laptop reading “What not to do after turning 24 years”. Am at a point in life where I need to focus on my life. A point where no ones’ opinion should matter on what I want to do with my life.
I get to the office and find colleagues waiting for me..they start singing the happy birthday song and the emotional me starts crying. This is because it has just hit me that am not home and I had really wished I would be home to celebrate my birthday. But all in all, am smiling and telling them thanks. By now, my Facebook has over thirty plus messages on my wall saying happy birthday which is a reminder to me that am one year older.
As am settling down, I receive an M-Pesa message. You should have seen the smile on my face after seeing the message. It is from my mama where it’s followed by a message reading ‘Happy bday dear daughter. That is for you to have the best birthday as you turn a year older‘. My mama has the habit of sending M-Pesa to my siblings and I during our birthdays. I must admit it’s a good gesture since my birthday comes when ‘mwezi iko kwa corner.’ I usually make sure I remind her a day or two before my birthday so that she prepares herself in advance (I hope she does not read this)
Writing about my mama just reminded me of the previous post I wrote ‘Please someone convince me‘. I wrote about how I have this heavy load to carry. How I feel I owe the world some explanation on what I want to do with my life. I do not know where she got the story from but she called me that night asking if I am doing fine. Well, I explained to her that I was just expressing myself in words and she was like ‘Come home during the weekend we shall talk about what is happening in your life‘.
“Mum seriously I was just expressing myself!! Trust me everything is fine and am doing well.” I told her.
“Uko sure hakuna kitu kinakusumbua? – :” She insisted
(Are you sure nothing is disturbing you?)
“Yes Ma’ am sure.“
“Lakini mbona umeandika hivo? Unaeza kuja weekend tuongee ukiniambia shida ni nini.”
(But why have you written like that? You can come during the weekend we talk about it)
Ok…here is the thing. As I was writing that story, something was disturbing my mind but I just can’t recall what that was right now. But there was no way I was going to stress my mum with my life. I think she has handled a lot and I need to give her a break as a wise daughter would do. Trust me the call ended by me been told to go home for the weekend to talk about this life I owe some explanation to. The truth is I cannot thank my mum enough for been there for me. The past year has been amazing!
I have made friends, I have lost friends but that is what life is.
I have learnt to let go what does not benefit me and accept change.
I have learnt that not everyone is your friend so choose wisely.
I have learnt that life is an experience on it’s own.
I have learnt to be a giver and keep smiling.
I have learnt to never give up and be positive about each situation I face in life e.t.c
As I turn a year older, I cannot thank God enough as I wait to see what this year has for me!!
Cheers to me for turning a year older!!!!!!
I did a YouTube video on my stay here in Zanzibar. Click HERE to watch.