The Old Me

I flew to Germany for my christmas holiday. Yeah..that is just me in the fantasy world. A world that I see myself in a few years. A dream I know will come to pass.



I just realized how old am getting. 2016 was a year I never thought would come to be. Back in 2010, 2016 seemed so far away. Now 2015 is gone. Gone so fast that I feel I might not have achieved what I intended to achieve in 2015. This year I vowed no resolutions. I will just live life. I will just continue to grow old and wise. I dread the thought of growing old. Can’t I just grow younger? I miss me in my teens. In my eighteen, seventeen. When I thought I will never grow older than that. When I never worried about anything.

Can we stop time? I don’t want to grow older than I am.

Now I know why ladies never tell how old they are.  Am at that point  and age where  I will walk in the streets of Nairobi, watch girls walking in crop tops and tights, shake my head in disbelief, ask myself  what the next generation after this will wear. I will also tell God to help us. The make-up on their faces will leave me wondering whether  in Kenya there is an ‘Exxagerated make-up contest’ that I don’t know about.

At this age and time, I will hop into a bus, listen to the loud music and think of moving out of the vehicle because the music will be too loud for me to contain. Staring at the youngsters in the bus, wondering if they can’t hear how loud the music is! I might go ahead and tell the conductor to reduce the volume of the music, just that he will not care at all.

At this age and time, I will go to a club, order drinks and sit with my friends and just look into the thin air as I enjoy the music.  This type of music will be slow and soothing. Leave the likes of amarula and kanambo, I am now too old to be dancing to that and shaking my bumbum as I bendover to a total stranger. If the DJ plays Amarula, I will sit back as I watch guys dancing to the song. We will just be sitting and enjoying the music not a single thought of rising up to dance. And that is what I will call a night made.

At this age and time, I will be invited to a lot of ‘kunywa soda’ by my friends. I mean ‘Rurashio’. I will go to weddings on most of my saturdays and that is when it will click right that am now old. Old that all my friends are getting married. The fact that I will be single will leave me no option but to start searching  for my right hand man. No, wait. I will not search. I will remain patient till my right hand man finds me. I will just start praying and going to church on sunday for God to hear my prayers. Who knows! My man might just be among the congregation. This is when my mama indirectly starts telling me ‘Na ujue unazeeka’.

At this age and time, I will realize that it does not make sense to have a thousand and one friends that do not help you in any way. I will get rid of my fake friends. All the fake friends that we ain’t helping each other because I will notice that life is too short to spend with fake people who pretend to care. The truth is I will have a few valuable friends. Friends that we will be together in thick and thin.

At this age and time, I will go back to my bank account and realize it’s almost negative. All I did was have fun and impromptu buying and now  here comes the consequences. My focus will be on making money and saving. Start working on a budget but still have fun. I will also prove to my mama that I love reading hence go back to school to pursue a masters degree.

Road trips with friends will be minimized to like two in a year.

I will also not accept or reply to anyone who types ‘xaxa kithy. uko piwa?’. Like what does that even mean!?

Old as I am, I will be grateful to God for the life that he has given me. Focus on my life and continue dreaming because I know my dreams are valid.  Lupita said so.



KithyLouise is a Nairobi Based Writer. IT software engineer by profession and Creative Writer by passion. She loves writing about her personal experiences, travel and telling short stories. She is a young talent promoter and a Youtuber. She has also written an online book series that she wishes to publish one day.

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